Fooling Around…

…With limericks and double-dactyls

There was once a schizo named Jeter
or Joseph or Theodore or Skeeter
He had a nice wife
who said all of her life
“…All I long for is a nice Peter.”

I took a masked girl on a date
she wouldn’t let me up to the plate…
Well, last weekend this shrew
sat on a screw…
Now you’ll recognize her by her gait.

We all know the ride of Revere,
yet the history of it it is queer;
Longfellow’s the cause
that William Dawes
remains to this day in the rear.

I met an old wizard who was very confused
he forgot all his spells, yet still seemed enthused
I managed to ask,
“Sir, how do you cast?”
I don’t fish much, he answered, amused.

Being not much in the physical could
put a scholarly ghost in a clinical mood
“That girl that just passed me,
she brings up the past, see”
In death I’m invisible too.

Higgeldy-Piggeldy
one’s concentration is
forthwith required for
hours on end…
Still I continue on –
monolomaniacally –
till to my will will these
syllables bend.

Higgeldy-Piggeldy
Sir Thomas Malory
wrote about Lancelot’s
Guinevere thing.
He did behave oh so
melodramatically
when he was told of her
specialty swing.

Higgeldy-Piggeldy
bellowed her ladyship
I want my champagne while
I’m in the nude.
Madam, sighed Jeeves as he,
half-unabashedly,
poured half the bubbly down
between her boobs.

p.s. – Apologies for the reversed feet in a few of those dactyls. Meter and I haven’t danced in a while.

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